Exercises to overcome the psychological barriers of communication. Barriers in communication and ways to overcome them. Behavior at a distance

Game-acquaintance "Spindle". The players sit in a circle (gatherings are generally desirable to be done sitting around the table or just in a circle). Someone (maybe a teacher) is holding a spindle and a ball in his hands. Calling his name, he winds the first turn of thread on the spindle, passes it to another, leaving the ball with him. The one sitting on the left (“salting” - along the course of the sun) calls the name of the first player and his own, the next - the names of the previous participants and adds his own, and so on until the end of the chain of players. The host, having received the spindle back, unwinds the thread, repeating the names in reverse order. Another time you can start against the course of the sun - from right to left.

The game "Tangle". The group sits in a circle (at rehearsal - around the table). The host (adult or child) throws a ball to one of the participants, leaving the beginning of the thread with him, and asks a question. For example: "What's your name?" or "What do you like?" The child, having caught the ball, gives an answer and throws the ball with the question to the next player, winding the thread around his finger. Gradually, all the players will be connected by many threads. This simple technique immediately evokes in the players a sense of multilateral connections and collective action. The game can be organized in the first two classes in a row, later - included in the work as newcomers (two or three) appear. It can also be used in the learning process as a form of organization of reflection.

The game "We'll line up now." Building-ranking on any basis: by height, by seniority, by hair color (from brunettes to blondes and vice versa), by the first letters of the name, etc. To the music, children move freely around the room. As soon as the music stops, everyone lines up according to the stipulated condition.

The game "Bell" (Zamorev S.I., 2002). We stand in a circle, join hands and imagine that we are a huge and heavy copper bell of a very low tone. The one who wishes can stand in the center and be the "language" of this "bell". And one more participant - "ringer", those who shake this bell. The "bell" also swings in a given rhythm. Zamorev S.I. offers this and similar games ("At the galley", "Dances of the savages", etc.) as rhythmic. However, such games develop the ability to interact in the process of playing out the situation, train the skill of ensemble performance, improvisation in a group. Therefore, they can serve as a communicative training.

Game "Dragon" (Samoukina N.V., 1993).

The game "Demosthenes" (based on the story of the ancient Greek orator Demosthenes and the exercise "I will crush with verses", Vagapova D.Kh., 2001).

1. Reading a previously learned poem (the size is negotiated) with a strong background noise.

2. All participants are divided into pairs, the pairs sit opposite each other, take each other's hands and, looking eye to eye, each begin to read his own poem. Possible targets:


Don't fall off yourself

· to be heard,

Impose your poem on the opponent, knock him down, but not by raising his voice, but by the expressiveness and persuasiveness of the performance.

The game "Snowball" (Grudtsyna N.G., 1998). The purpose of the game: the development of imagination, the ability to listen carefully, the development of auditory and figurative memory. Everyone can play sitting in a circle. The first person passes the key to the neighbor on the left (it can be an imitating object or an imaginary key) with the words "I sell you the key to the royal castle." The neighbor passes the key on, quickly repeating the same phrase, and so on, until the key returns to the first player. The first player says the phrase: "I'm selling you a string on which hangs the key to the royal castle." The players pass the key, repeating the words of the first. The third circle is accompanied by the words: "I sell you a mouse that has gnawed through the string on which the key to the royal castle hangs." Fourth circle: "I sell you a cat that ate a mouse that gnawed through the string on which the key to the royal castle hangs." Last round: "I sell you a dog that bit a cat, that ate a mouse that gnawed through the string on which the key to the royal castle hangs." The winner is the one who repeated the entire phrase quickly without missing a single word.

You can perform a variant of the game when a long-winded phrase is composed by a phrase from each player. A more difficult option: come up with a coherent and logically completed plot of a fairy tale, poem, etc. To complete this option, children should already have an idea of ​​​​the text structure and compositional structure. In this version, there are signs of a language game.

Development trainings with teenagers: Creativity, communication, self-knowledge Gretsov Andrey Gennadievich

5. Overcoming barriers

5. Overcoming barriers

The main objective of this exercise is to overcome the barrier to creative self-realization, which consists in the fact that people consider many things impossible “by definition” and, as a result, do not even try to implement them. The exercises make it possible to demonstrate the conditionality of the concepts “possible – impossible”, their dependence on a number of assumptions. This prompts us to look at familiar things from a new angle, rethink and, in some cases, overcome external and internal limitations. Along with this, during the implementation of these exercises, the qualities of creative thinking continue to develop, and team building also takes place.

Exercise "Hanger"

Description of the exercise: Participants, united in subgroups of 3-4 people, are invited to make 2 lists.

1. What can be done with a hanger.

3. What can not be done with a hanger.

5-7 minutes are allotted for this work, then the lists are announced. After that, it is proposed to come up with ways by which you can turn the item from list 2 (“impossible”) into items from list 1 (“possible”). 6-8 more minutes are allotted for this work.

Encouraging participants to generate ideas that at first glance go beyond common sense. Demonstration of the relativity of the concepts "possible" and "impossible", their dependence on a number of conditions and assumptions.

Discussion. Representatives from each of the subgroups tell what “impossible” statements they managed to turn into possible ones and in what way. If some statements remained on the list of impossible ones, then what is the reason for this, what restrictions could not be overcome? Participants are then asked to give examples from personal experience in which the seemingly impossible turned out to be quite possible, and to suggest what kind of rejection of conventions, assumptions or traditions was associated with this.

Exercise "Hot snow"

Description of the exercise: Participants are asked to imagine several items or objects that have qualities that at the ordinary level seem incompatible with them. For example, these objects can be:

Hot Snow;

Black light;

Tiny giant;

Old child.

Participants describe what kind of objects they can be, under what conditions their appearance is possible, what other unusual properties possesses each of them, and also draw these objects. The exercise is performed in subgroups of 3-4 people, the time of work is determined at the rate of 3 minutes / object.

The psychological meaning of the exercise. Practicing the technique of agglutination - generating creative ideas by combining, presenting in new and unusual combinations of what is in everyday life appears to be incompatible.

Discussion. First, representatives of each of the subgroups share their ideas about these objects and demonstrate the completed illustrations, then the facilitator explains what the essence of agglutination is and asks the participants to give their thoughts and examples of how it is used in creativity.

Exercise "Arch"

Description of the exercise: Participants are united in 2–3 teams, receive A4 paper, and they are given the task: to make an arch from one sheet of such a size that any of the participants can pass through it. The arch must consist of a continuous strip of paper, but the use of any fasteners is not allowed, only scissors are at the disposal of the participants. The method of performing this exercise is not explained to the participants. If the group is “advanced”, easily coping with creative tasks, then it makes sense to complicate the exercise: ask the participants not only to build such an arch, but to come up with and demonstrate as many ways as possible for this (10 minutes), and also arrange a competition between subgroups: who invented more ways like this.

The psychological meaning of the exercise. Practicing the skills of generating ideas in teamwork, rallying participants. The exercise is also interesting in that the proposed task usually seems impossible to most participants at first, but then they are convinced that it is not difficult to complete it, they just need to put forward ideas on how to do it. This allows us to demonstrate the conventionality of the concepts of "possible - impossible" and show that one should not immediately abandon the task or call it "stupid" if the solution method does not immediately come to mind.

Discussion.“To whom at first it seemed that the exercise was impossible to perform? Then you were convinced that in fact it is simple, you just need to understand how. How often do we have situations in life when we can’t see a way to do something, so we consider it basically impossible and don’t even try?

Exercise "What has ..."

Description of the exercise: Participants are invited to come up with as many items as possible that have: buttons, handles, covers.

The exercise is performed in a general circle. First, the leader mentions one of these details, and the participants alternately name one object that has such a detail. Whoever cannot name the item is out of the game. The winner is the one who last remains in the game. If this did not take too long and the interest of the participants has not yet been exhausted, it makes sense to repeat the game 2-3 times, taking other parts of the objects.

The psychological meaning of the exercise.“Intellectual warm-up”, training the ability to search for information on given grounds, including some unexpected ones. So, for example, it turns out that not only a door or a bag has a handle, but also a small doll or an old truck engine (it is turned on by scrolling the starter handle).

Discussion. A short exchange of impressions will suffice.

Exercise "Make Healthier"

Description of the exercise: Participants are invited to consider what things would be more useful if they were:

Increase decrease;

Raise/lower;

Make it more expensive/cheaper.

The exercise is performed in subgroups of 4-5 people, the time of work is 10-12 minutes. After that, representatives from each of the subgroups voice their options.

The psychological meaning of the exercise. In addition to developing the ability to generate ideas, the exercise provides material for analyzing the effectiveness of various ways of organizing teamwork.

Discussion. How was the work distributed in the team: did everyone take one pair of signs in turn, each expressed any ideas that came to mind, each took some part of the task for himself and worked with it individually or in some other way? What turned out to be more effective and what is it connected with?

Exercise "Only with me"

Description of the exercise: Participants are encouraged to find and write down as many answers to each of the questions as possible:

"What can only happen to:

People over the age of 30;

Millionaires;

Born in the XXI century;

Citizens of Russia?

The participants' attention should be drawn to the significance of the word "only": no matter how often or rarely this happens to those about whom in question more importantly, it can't happen to anyone else at all. This part of the exercise is performed in microgroups of 3-4 people (10-12 minutes). When it is completed, each of the participants is invited to individually reflect on the question “What can happen only to me and to no one else?” and write down the answers found (5 minutes).

The psychological meaning of the exercise. The first part of the exercise allows you to work out both the skill of generating ideas and the ability to evaluate them in accordance with the conditions of the assignment. The second part also has a psychotherapeutic connotation: it promotes awareness and acceptance of one's individuality.

Discussion. First, the participants voice their options and share the emotions and feelings that arose during the exercise, then they are invited to reflect on the following questions:

Which is harder to come up with: something that can happen to someone, or something that can't happen to anyone else? What is it connected with?

Under what conditions is what you say can only happen to someone (and especially only to you) still be able to happen to someone else?

Exercise "(Not) Creative person"

Description of the exercise: Participants each take a sheet of paper and receive the following instruction: “Please lay your sheet horizontally and divide it in half with a vertical line. And now draw a creative person on the left half of the sheet, and an uncreative person on the right: just as you imagine them. The artistic qualities of the drawing do not matter, the main thing is to express with its help what, from your point of view, distinguishes creative and non-creative people. 6-8 minutes are given for drawing, then the drawings are laid out one under the other (in such a way that a series of images of a creative person is obtained, and in parallel - a series of images of an uncreative one) and the participants comment in turn which qualities of these characters are reflected in their drawings. The facilitator fixes the named qualities and then, making a summary, once again pronounces those of them that were mentioned most often.

The psychological meaning of the exercise. Comprehending by the participants of the stereotypes existing in their minds about which people are creative and which are not, and how this manifests itself outwardly.

Discussion. What new things did each of the participants learn during this exercise? How, in their opinion, is it possible to verbalize the meaning of the phrase “uncreative person” without using the particle “not”?

From the book Body Language [How to read the thoughts of others by their gestures] author Piz Alan

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It is well enough known that business communication, unlike friendly communication, is entered out of necessity. At the same time, contact with some business partners is easy, while with others, only the interests of the business force to continue the relationship.

Communication always involves at least two people. Everyone simultaneously influences and is affected, since both one and the other interlocutor are alternately both the speaker and the listener. Who is responsible for the success of communication? It can be argued that in most situations the "responsibility" lies with the speaker. It is he who is "guilty" if he could not draw attention to the main thing, if the interlocutor did not hear, did not understand, did not remember. It was he, the speaker, who did not try, did not "ensure" efficiency. In other words, the listener is the passive side, and the speaker is the active side.

But in many situations of communication, a person is faced with the fact that his words, his desires and motives are somehow incorrectly perceived by the interlocutor, "do not reach" him. Sometimes it even seems that the communication partner defends himself from us, our words and experiences, setting up some kind of barriers-filters, passing through which, our words partly get stuck in them, partly change beyond recognition.

What are communication barriers?

Essence and classification of communication barriers. Communication barriers are psychological difficulties that arise in the process of communication, causing conflicts or preventing mutual understanding and interaction. They can be associated with the characters of people, their aspirations, views, speech characteristics, manners of communication.

Taking as a basis the structure of communication (perceptual, interactive and communicative components), one can respectively classify and communication barriers.

  • 1. Barriers of perception and understanding:
    • - aesthetic(the external impression is extremely unfavorable);
    • - social(differences in social status);
    • - barrier of negative emotions(fear, anger, resentment, irritation, mood, suffering, grief, shame and guilt, contempt, disgust, disgust);
    • - installation barrier(stereotypes or pre-formed negative attitudes are triggered in relation to the company, organization, you personally);
    • - barrier psychological protection (when a person is confident in himself, he has complexes and he builds his behavior from a position of defense, self-defense).
  • 2. Interaction barriers:
    • - barrier of communication styles;
    • - ethical barrier(moral incompatibility of business partners);
    • - motivational barrier(the difference in motives for making contact);
    • - barrier technology and communication skills;
    • - character barrier.
  • 3. Communication barrier:
    • - speech barrier;
    • - hearing barrier;
    • - modality barrier(various representational systems);
    • - incompetence.

Let's take a closer look at some of them.

Characteristics of the barrier of negative emotions

The barrier of negative emotions is one of the most common in the practice of communication, and it is associated with one or another emotional and mental state of the individual.

Barrier of suffering (grief). Almost everyone has encountered it. Both physical and mental pain are so riveting to a person's thoughts that it is difficult at this moment to count on his attention and support.

The barrier in communication, created by suffering and grief, distorts the perception of others: someone else's joy often causes pain and envy, gives rise to selfishness (because of self-pity) or, conversely, altruism as a way to drown out the feeling of guilt in front of someone. Sometimes suffering leads to aggressiveness. Faced with this barrier, it is probably best to "leave the person alone" at least for a while.

barrier of anger especially difficult to overcome. It arises from resentment, dissatisfaction, injustice, rudeness. In this situation, a person, especially a vulnerable one, often "goes in cycles" on the root cause of his anger, cannot and does not want to talk about anything else. Communication with him is difficult: it is difficult to "get through" to a person, and any attempt to establish contact generates new negative emotions("moral aggression").

Anger literally doubles physical and mental energy, gives extraordinary courage. Therefore, if you meet with an angry person, do not "add fuel to the fire", do not test his endurance reserves at this time!

Barrier of disgust, disgust associated with the psycho-physiological characteristics of people's behavior: unpleasant manners, repulsive habits, violation of the rules of personal hygiene, non-observance of "distance in communication".

Therefore, in order not to cause such a barrier in relation to oneself, a person must monitor his manners, cleanliness, and habits.

barrier of contempt often the result of prejudices, such as racial, national, professional. If a person is reproached for being independent of him, he usually pays in the same coin - contempt.

Barrier of fear - the most difficult to overcome in communication. Modern man most often afraid of not coping with the assigned task, not fulfilling the production plan or failing the exam, fears for health and well-being loved one, fear of loneliness, punishment, etc. Fear overshadows a person's life and sometimes pushes to unscrupulousness, fawning, lies.

Barrier of shame and guilt. He is familiar to everyone. The face is filled with paint, the voice becomes uncertain, it is difficult to raise your head and look into the eyes of the interlocutor. Shame arises as a feeling of inappropriateness of what is happening and embarrassment for oneself and another, as something associated with guilt. Shame most often seizes a person with criticism, but sometimes with inappropriate praise. Therefore, do not be surprised when the interlocutor, instead of blurring in a joyful smile in response to praises, hides his eyes, blushes, seeks to say goodbye as soon as possible. Shame protects against immoral acts, makes you listen to criticism in relation to yourself and others. To avoid this unpleasant feeling, a person is forced to mentally "lose", think through the situation, evaluate the possibility of a negative attitude towards himself on the part of others and, in extreme cases, use means of psychological protection. He should learn:

  • 1) instill in yourself that this or that moment should not cause a feeling of shame, since many do "this way";
  • 2) do not listen to the one who systematically criticizes him, switching to a more pleasant topic;
  • 3) look for justifying motives (“even if I don’t know how to do this, but I’m great at doing something else”).

Those who suffer from excessive shyness and shyness will do well to know these options for protection (people who are "shameless", alas, learned all this long ago).

Mood barrier. It can be of varying severity (from just "getting up on the wrong foot" to deep depression) and have various causes. The main ones are, of course, interpersonal conflicts, quarrels, unwillingness to meet the other, resentment against each other, when only one’s own rightness is recognized, unfulfilled expectations, deceived hopes, refusal to do something that was counted on, etc. d. Given that the mood in communicating with others plays a special role - it is very contagious and has a "boomerang effect", i.e. returns to us - a business person should master the art of emotional self-regulation.

Teacher-psychologist Savintseva E.V.

TOPIC: Communication barriers - communication.

Target: improvement of communication skills and abilities.

Tasks :

  • Improving Communication Skills:
  • Formation of the ability to make contact.
  • Developing the ability to listen and understand another person.
  • Formation of the ability to receive and transmit information.
  • Formation of the ability to regulate emotional stress;
  • Removal of barriers and fears in the process of interpersonal interaction.
  • Increasing self-confidence.
  • Formation of self-regulation skills.
  • Increasing group cohesion.

Progress.

The only way to set people up for vigorous activity is to communicate with them. Lee Iacocca

Every person is familiar with the situation when the words that he pronounces “do not reach” his interlocutor or “reach”, but they are perceived incorrectly. It may even give the impression that the interlocutor deliberately defends himself from other people's words, thoughts, experiences, putting up barriers to communication.

A communication barrier is usually understood as everything that prevents effective communication and blocks it. One of the deepest delusions is that people think that it is enough to express their thought for others to properly perceive it. This fallacy is based on the assumption that the transmitted message reaches its addressee without any changes. In reality, it often turns out differently: some say one thing, while others listen to them and understand something completely different. This happens because all messages are exposed to numerous noise and interference, significantly reducingcommunication effectiveness. It is practically impossible to take into account the entire set of factors distorting the message - they are too diverse. In every kind of human activity - in politics, economics, culture, etc. - there are own barriers due to the specifics of these types of activities.

The main communication barriers in communication.
Speech, any kind of information has always been and is a way of suggesting something.
Thus, a communicative barrier is a psychological obstacle to adequate information between communication partners. What are these barriers and how can they be overcome?

1. Barrier "authority". Dividing all people into authoritative and non-authoritative, a person trusts only the first and refuses to trust others. Thus, trust and distrust do not depend on the characteristics of the transmitted information, but on the one who speaks. What is meant by "authority"?

attractive appearance (whether the hairstyle is neat, combed, ironed, shaved, fastened with all buttons, etc.);

benevolent attitude towards the addressee of influence(smile, friendliness, ease of handling, etc.);

competencies;

sincerity moreover, if the listener trusts the speaker, then he perceives and remembers the conclusions very well and practically does not pay attention to the course of reasoning. If there is less trust, then he is cooler about the conclusions, but he is very attentive to the arguments and the course of reasoning.

2 . avoidance barrier.A person avoids sources of influence, avoids contact with the interlocutor. If it is impossible to evade, then he makes every effort not to perceive the message (inattentive, does not listen, does not look at the interlocutor, uses any pretext to end the conversation). The main thing is to solve two interrelated problems:

1. draw attention;

2. keep attention.

Reception of "eye contact". The speaker looks around the audience, looks intently at someone, selects a few people in the audience and nods. If we communicate with a person, we look at him.

Equally important is the problem of maintaining attention.

Reception of "isolation" (when they take the interlocutor aside, retire, close doors and windows in lecture halls, make comments to the speaker.

The technique of “imposing a rhythm” (a constant change in the characteristics of voice and speech, i.e. speaking either louder, then quieter, then faster, then slower, then expressively, “with pressure”, then patter, then neutrally, the speaker, as it were, imposes his interlocutor attention switching sequence). This technique eliminates the monotony of the sound.

3 . Barrier "misunderstanding".Often the source of information is trustworthy, authoritative, but the information “does not reach” (we don’t hear, we don’t see, we don’t understand). Why is this happening and how can these problems be solved?

Phonetic barriermisunderstanding occurs in the following cases:

When speaking quickly, indistinctly and with an accent.

It is quite possible to overcome the phonetic barrier, and for this it is important:

Intelligible, legible and loud enough speech, without tongue twisters;

audience counting and individual features people (the worse a person knows the subject of discussion, the slower you need to speak, the more you need to explain, people of different nationalities they speak at different speeds: in the north and in the middle lane - slower, in the south - faster; small children and old people do not perceive fast speech, etc.);

The presence of feedback with the interlocutor, with the audience.

The barrier of logical misunderstanding arisesif a person, from our point of view, says or does something contrary to the rules of logic; then we not only refuse to understand him, but also emotionally perceive his words negatively. At the same time, we implicitly assume that there is only one logic - correct, i.e. our.

However, it's not a secret for anyone that there are different logics: women's, children's, age, etc. Each person thinks, lives and acts according to his own logic, but in communication, unless these logics are correlated or if a person does not have a clear idea about the partner’s logic, a barrier of logical misunderstanding arises.

In order to avoid such situations, the following conditions must be observed:

Each person has his own position, and in the course of the conversation we feel this position;

Correct reasoning.

How to overcome communication barriers? Our typical mistakes:

1. Rule of specificity.

Vague, ambiguous, vague expressions and words should be avoided, and without the need to use unfamiliar or highly specialized terms, overload the message with "professionalisms".

2.Rule of opennessmeans the readiness to revise one's point of view under the influence of newly discovered circumstances, as well as the ability to accept and take into account the point of view of the interlocutor.

3. The rule of "own wrong."

When communicating, it is always necessary to admit that a personal point of view may be wrong. This very often warns against very serious mistakes and gross miscalculations.

There are also many ways to overcome communication barriers.

  1. The “relationship mirror” technique consists of a kind smile and a pleasant facial expression, indicating that “I am your friend.”
  2. Reception "golden words" consists in expressing compliments to a person, contributing to the effect of suggestion.
  3. The "patient listener" technique stems from patient and attentive listening to a person's problems.

Practical part.

Discussion of the parable "Not all at once."

Ex. "Broken phone".

Target: creating an atmosphere of trust and security, increasing the spontaneity of the participants and their emancipation, raising the mood, bringing the group closer.
Ex. "Gypsy and horse".

Purpose: ex. It is aimed at uniting the group, clarifying the intricate relationships in the group, developing empathy, group dynamics.

Conclusion.
In our turbulent time of the information revolution, the relevance of communications is not decreasing, but rather increasing. Communication is important in all spheres of human activity. We all live by exchanging information with each other. And the more effective this exchange, the more opportunities we have for effective work and a prosperous personal life.

Communication barriers are not always an obstacle in the communication process.

There is a kind of barrier system automated security- in case of a peculiar operation of the security alarm, the approaches to the person are automatically blocked. Otherwise, the human brain and psyche simply could not withstand the collapse of information. However, sometimes barriers play a negative role.

Thus, communication barriers are not the result of a conscious, arbitrary and directed protection from the impact of information. Their action is contradictory.

Preview:

COMMUNICATIVE BARRIERS-COMMUNICATION

Teacher-psychologist of the CTT Savintseva E.V.


Communication has long been an integral part of our lives. At work, while studying, in transport, at home, on the Internet - but you never know where else! It occupies the lion's share of our time. And everything would be fine if it were not for communication barriers. It is they, these annoying hindrances, that prevent us from enjoying and benefiting from it. These barriers arise in a variety of situations and in almost every person. Therefore, in order to achieve success in life, you need to have a good understanding of what communication barriers are and how to overcome them.

What are the difficulties in communication?

Probably, each of you had the feeling that the interlocutor seemed to be defending himself, erecting an invisible wall between you. This wall is that notorious barrier. Where do they come from? Communication barriers appear in our lives for various reasons - as a rule, this is a close interweaving of the characteristics of our characters and situations. And already, it happens, you can’t figure out who or what is to blame.

As mentioned above, almost every person faced problems in various communication situations, regardless of their gender, age, social status, values ​​and attitudes. This can only mean one thing - the reasons for which there are barriers to communication are different, and they are present in the life of every person.

These reasons may or may not be recognized by communicating people. It largely depends on how quickly these people notice that they have problems, understand what kind they are, and finally be able to solve them. By the way, communication barriers can even be contrived by one or more interlocutors - and even this is enough for failures in interacting with each other.

It must be said that some barriers may be more common than others in certain people and in certain situations. They can be characteristic of a certain gender, age, profession, nationality, culture, situation. Each of these patterns deserves separate consideration, but we will not do this in the framework of our article.

So, what are the main types of communication barriers?

Communication barriers. These are communication barriers associated with the exchange of information between interlocutors in the course of communication. What are they?

semantic barrier. He gets in your way when you and your interlocutor mean completely different things by the same concepts. Such a barrier occurs almost always and everywhere, because. We have a very different understanding of many things. For example, for one girl, a good husband is one who loves her, takes care of her, earns enough money, wants a child, likes to spend time with her; and for the other, the one who rarely drinks and rarely beats her. Therefore, speaking on the same topic - “what kind of men are all the same!” - they will actually talk about different things and may encounter misunderstandings with each other. In order to destroy this barrier, it is necessary to understand the partner and his picture of the world well - the meanings that he puts into various concepts. In case of possible inaccuracies, always explain in detail what you mean, and try to use words and phrases that are understandable to the interlocutor.

logical barrier. In fact, this is the inability to express one's thoughts. In the speech of such a person, causal relationships are confused, there is a substitution of concepts. Or it can be difficult for him to find words for those complex thoughts that run through his head. If you encounter such an interlocutor, then be patient: listen to him very carefully and ask questions - this will help you get the information you need. If you yourself sin with such a feature, then it is better to try to get rid of it. Hear how good speakers or writers express their thoughts, read a textbook on logic, sign up for public speaking classes, or simply ask friends to give you feedback with recommendations - any of these options will help you become a more attractive companion.

phonetic barrier. This is a bad speech technique - when it is not clear what the interlocutor is saying, and this makes it difficult to perceive information. If you are interested in communicating with this person, then there are several options. In formal or business communication, you will have to adapt to his manner of speaking, occasionally asking again in incomprehensible moments. In informal or friendly communication, you can gently convey to the interlocutor that it is difficult for you to understand him because of some features of his speech. Ask him, if possible, to adapt to you and correct them.

modality barrier. We all receive information from the world through five senses, but one of them is a priority. This is your modality. For example, people with a visual modality are best at assimilating the information they see, but the information they hear is much worse. Knowing this, try to immediately determine the modality of your interlocutor and use it: show graphs and diagrams to the visual, play with your voice with the auditory, and touch the kinesthetic more often and show everything “on your fingers”. Use appropriate verbs in your speech, such as “see,” “hear,” or “feel.”

Personal barrier. Each of us has a character, and some of its features may not suit someone. But for someone, these features are so pointed that his character can be a barrier in communication. This may be due to ignorance of their features or a lack of self-control. For example, excessive slowness or, conversely, fussiness can annoy communication partners. In case you yourself have encountered such a person, try to communicate your discomfort and ask him to be slower or faster. Well, try to adequately perceive your own shortcomings, because. for some, they can also become a barrier.

Interaction barriers. These are barriers associated with interaction with a person during communication and arising from dissatisfaction with the behavior of a communication partner. As a rule, there are significant differences in the positions of the interlocutors.

Motivational barrier. It occurs when communication partners have different motives for making contact. For example, you want support from a friend, but she wants you to discuss her new dress. In this case, you may encounter misunderstanding and even quarrel. To prevent this from happening, it will be useful to indicate your own motives in time: “You know, now I really need you to support me, and then we will discuss the dress.”

barrier of incompetence. Often found in collaboration. You may be angry at your partner's incompetence when he starts talking nonsense that is obvious to you. This causes feelings of anger, frustration and wasted time. You have two options - either gradually push him to a deeper understanding of the issue (for example, gently explaining something), or curtail communication. The choice is yours, and it depends on your goals.

ethical barrier. It arises in a situation of incompatibility of the moral positions of communication partners. The main thing is not to try to re-educate or ridicule your interlocutor. It is much more correct to curtail communication or try to find some kind of compromise, especially if you have some important common goal.

communication style barrier. Each of us has our own unique style. It depends on temperament, character, upbringing, profession and other factors. As a rule, it takes a long time to form, and then it becomes difficult to change it. Communication style includes the main motive (why do you communicate - self-affirmation, support, etc. ...), attitude towards others (kindness, tolerance, cruelty ...), attitude towards yourself and the nature of the impact on people (pressure, manipulation, persuasion and etc...). Most often, we have to simply accept the communication style of another person, since it is difficult to change it, and communication is often necessary.

Barriers to understanding and perception. These are barriers associated with the perception and knowledge of each other, as well as with the establishment of mutual understanding on this basis.

aesthetic barrier. It occurs when we do not like the way the interlocutor looks. There are various reasons for its occurrence, for example, if he is untidy or slovenly dressed, or we are annoyed by something in his appearance. It can be difficult not to think about it, but it is necessary, because this contact can be very important for us.

social barrier. The reason for difficulties in communication may be the different social status of partners. However, it is important to remember here that the appearance of such a barrier is primarily associated with attitudes in the minds of the interlocutors. If they attach importance to each other's social position and for them it can be an obstacle, this can complicate communication. But for many situations, status is unimportant - for example, to discuss some of your favorite activities or support each other.

Barrier of negative emotions. Agree, it is quite difficult to communicate with an upset or angry person. Many of us tend to take these emotions personally (at least in part). Here it is necessary to remember that often the reason for the bad mood of the interlocutor lies in some other things - the situation in the family, problems at work or a personal crisis. However, if the negative emotions of the interlocutor significantly impede the conversation, it is better to postpone it for another time.

installation barrier. Very often, communication is complicated if your partner initially does not have a very good opinion of you. In most cases, it will be best to discuss this issue and honestly ask the interlocutor about it, try to explain to him that he is mistaken. In those situations where this is not possible, just try to take this fact into account and build your communication with your partner carefully enough. When some time passes and he realizes that his installation is not supported by anything, it may disappear by itself.

Double barrier. It lies in the fact that we involuntarily think of our interlocutor as ourselves: we attribute our opinions and views to him and expect from him the same actions that we ourselves would have committed. But he is different! It is important not to forget about this and try to perceive and remember everything that distinguishes him from us.

Rudeness and ignorance. We all come across people who are simply ill-bred. Sometimes such treatment just needs to be endured, especially in the case when a person does not respond to comments. It is very important to remain polite in such a situation - sometimes this in itself suppresses rudeness. Remember that in dealing with such a person you have some kind of goal, and this is clearly not a desire to put him in his place.

Inability to listen. It manifests itself in a lack of interest in what you are saying, a desire to talk about yourself, or constant interruption. If you need a nosebleed in this situation to be listened to, try to speak better. Use various ways attracting attention: intonation, facial expressions, gestures, the basics of NLP.

Who is he - a person who regularly encounters barriers in communication?

We told you about the main barriers that prevent fruitful communication between people. However, have you noticed that some people constantly have some kind of difficulties associated with communication, while others go like clockwork?

Indeed, there are types of character that make it difficult to interact with other people. As a rule, such a person behaves in a similar way in completely different situations. And then he himself complains that no one wants to communicate with him. In this case, the personality of this person acts as a barrier in communication.

What are the main features of such a character? First of all, it is necessary to say about such a feature as global distrust. Such a person does not trust himself, nor people, nor the world in general. He is suspicious and opposed to those around him. As a rule, he achieves his goals at the expense of other people. At the same time, he is often torn apart by internal contradictions, which he is not very aware of. A person who is unsuccessful in communication is characterized by self-centeredness, authoritarianism and a tendency to manipulation.

He loves very much when he is praised, when he gets what he has long wanted. He has possessive traits. If his desires are not satisfied, he gets angry, but at the same time he almost never helps other people in achieving their goals and does not sympathize with them. Such a person is emotionally unstable, and his mood often changes. Those around him describe him as irritable and quick-tempered, but internally cold. He often experiences negative emotions and has a low level of self-control.

This person has a poor understanding of others and their feelings. He is insensitive to what happens to them, is distinguished by low insight and observation. It is not given to him to understand that something else may be important to the interlocutor or that he understands the meaning of this or that phrase in a different way. Often he is not able to predict and assess the future. He is characterized by timidity, isolation, self-doubt, alienation, passivity, lack of initiative.

Usually such a person turns out to be intolerant, poorly educated and ignorant. At the same time, he thinks in very rigid categories and frameworks, and the surrounding reality should not go beyond them. He has a lot of stereotypes. He is envious and at the same time conceited. Expects a lot from other people, prone to outbursts of jealousy.

He does not know how to argue his statements, choose an adequate form for them, establish and stop contact with others. Unsuccessful in communication, a person does not know how to give good feedback. He talks a lot and listens little, periodically makes unacceptably long pauses in his speech, likes to interrupt his interlocutors and then “slow down” (this is due to the fact that his vocabulary does not match what he wants to say).

For him, social norms often turn out to be incomprehensible - he does not know how to keep his distance, he is prone to blackmail, lies, pressure and aggression. Most often in communication uses the following strategies: protection and avoidance of communication, depreciation of the opinions of others and aggression, control over others or excessive formalism. Such a person can be characterized as immature, infantile, and sometimes immoral.

As a rule, this person is not very satisfied with his life and success. Any failures cause anger and aggression in him, as a result of which he often tries to achieve his goals by some immoral means. He does not value himself or other people. He lacks the ability to truly love and have close relationships, so he usually does not have friends and loved ones.

Indeed, the psychological portrait we have drawn is terrible and resembles the image of some kind of criminal or marginal. But in one way or another, it is. Constant communication difficulties are a symptom that a person has something wrong inside himself. But it is far from necessary that he will have all the features and features listed above. The psychological portrait written above is collective, and it includes a great many different people with a common problem. Therefore, in life you can observe only some individual traits and features.

Difficulties in communication and life situation

However, it all depends not only on the personality and character of the person. There are situations in which almost all of us become uncomfortable. This is reflected in all our behavior, including communication with other people. In this case, the barrier is the situation that caused discomfort, and its features.

Once in such circumstances, all participants in communication feel uncomfortable. Some are more aware of this, and some less so. At the same time, they do not just feel it - by chance or on purpose they prevent each other from satisfying their desires and achieving the goals of communication. As a result of this, everyone is worried, angry, do not understand each other and generally tense up. Most often this happens in situations of restriction, refusal, accusation and insult (which, in general, is not surprising).

On the one hand, collective memory affects. Humanity in general and the inhabitants of Russia in particular have repeatedly experienced suppression, repression, wars, famine. Therefore, insults, accusations, restrictions and refusals are very clearly imprinted in the minds of people, who subsequently use them more and more often to resolve conflicts, overcome obstacles, gain power and even seek happiness. This is becoming a typical way of responding to an entire nation, speaking globally.

On the other hand, having such a negative memory becomes optional when we have such a richly represented culture of aggression. Probably each of you will agree that in modern society aggression is given a lot of attention. All kinds of media are especially guilty of this - television, newspapers, magazines, the Internet, advertising companies. The culture of aggression is also gaining popularity due to some features of our lives: overcrowding of schools, hospitals and prisons, high level unemployment, low qualifications of people working with the population, low salaries and lack of career prospects, corruption, poor quality of government work and many other things that you know firsthand. You all experience this and know that these situations are always fraught with communication barriers.

How to understand that there is a barrier in communication?

Of course, being inside the situation, it is not difficult to do this. In the process of difficult communication, you experience discomfort, distrust of your partner, cannot open up, show emotions, do not know what to say - in general, such communication cannot be called easy. However, if you need to assess the presence of psychological barriers, then knowing how people behave in a situation of difficult communication will be very useful.

In the role of such an external indicator is our non-verbal. Hostility, craving for power and dominance, insincerity and the desire to stand out are especially clearly manifested in it. As we wrote above, our unlucky subject in communication can experience this whole gamut of feelings and desires. In what specific signs are all its negative features manifested?

1. First, it is eye contact. In the case of communication barriers, it is usually rare, not intense, and sometimes completely absent. Glances at a partner may be present (there are even long ones), but they all occur at the moment of active communication - especially when the interlocutor states something unpleasant, but important. At the same time, if the interlocutor begins to look away, sensing something was wrong, our “subject” will immediately try to pretend to be a darling and look into them - but this look will actually be cold and hard.

2. Secondly, this is the pose. Feeling difficulties in communication, people often take either unnatural, angular and tense postures, or vice versa, inadequately relaxed, sometimes even lax. Very often, the position of the body is closed (crossed arms, legs, the body turns away from the interlocutor) or “elevated” (the desire to sit higher, look down at the interlocutor).

3. Thirdly, gestures. As a rule, they are sharp and intense, which is also unnatural. The desire to hide the hands (for example, in pockets or behind the back), clench the hands into fists, “grab” or take more space due to posture and gestures is clearly expressed. This may be interspersed with private touching of oneself and the other.

4. Fourth, facial expressions. The face often expresses tension. Facial expressions are strange - for example, the mouth can smile, but the eyes remain motionless. In general, the face is characterized by expressions that demonstrate distrust and hostility towards the interlocutor, as well as contempt and anger.

Of course, a person experiencing communication difficulties does not always behave in this way. These are only the most typical and striking markers, and from them one can conclude not only that there are barriers in the interaction, but also about the interlocutors themselves - about their attitude towards each other and about their goals and guidelines in communication.

How to overcome communication difficulties?

So, we moved on to the most interesting thing - how to step over psychological barriers. Difficulties in communication are not easy, but they can be overcome. "How?" - you ask. And we will tell you about some ways and techniques to overcome communication barriers.

Watch your appearance. This does not mean that you should always look like a movie star on the red carpet. On the contrary, in many situations it will be pretentious and unnatural. Your appearance should evoke sympathy. This is facilitated by accuracy, neatness and the ability to wear those things that really suit you.

The manner of communication should correspond to the situation and people. Agree, it will be a bad move if at the disco you communicate with everyone with restraint and strictness, and at the negotiations - fun and without distance. Consider the characteristics of the interlocutor: his age, gender, upbringing, character and views. For example, you should not wear a short skirt to a meeting with a Muslim.

Try to put yourself in the place of a communication partner and try to understand his point of view. As you probably already understood, we are all different from each other. The same things are perfect for us different meanings, and we understand them differently. This is where most of the barriers come from. The best way to solve such problems is to allow the other to be different and different from you, and also to try to understand his position, even if you do not agree with it.

Practice empathy and sensitivity. This, accordingly, is the ability to empathize with other people and feel what is happening to them to the smallest changes in the state. These two traits are the key to success in communication.

Don't expect from your partners what they can't give you. So you only cause resentment in yourself and guilt in the other for not giving you. Try to want real things from partners that match their characteristics, and tell them about your expectations.

Do not try to fully live up to your partner's expectations. Firstly, it is boring, and secondly, it is very difficult, and it is impossible to exist like this for a long time. It is better to be natural to the maximum, but taking into account the interlocutor and social norms.

Watch your words. Your messages should be logically connected, contain information of interest to the interlocutor and rely on something in common - for example, a common understanding of the meaning of words or some kind of minimal shared memory. Your speech should be understandable to the interlocutor both in the literal sense and in the sense of matching his horizons.

Be open and honest about your thoughts, feelings, and expectations. If you are asked about something, and you are already sure of your refusal, it is better to voice it right away. So neither you nor the interlocutor will lose time and resources.

Reception "view from the side." Sometimes, in order to understand something (for example, to realize what specifically interferes with your communication with your partner), you need to look at the situation from the outside, describe it in abstract words without introducing your emotions and personal characteristics.

Respect your partner. Even if he annoys you incredibly, try to show your imagination and find something that will make you respect him. It can be some little thing, for example, his manner of highlighting individual words with intonation. Or something more serious - for example, a very rude person in communication, who at the same time spends half of his income on charity. In any person, you can find something good and worthy of respect, and if this does not work out, then you should think about it - do you really need this communication?

Unfortunately, in life there is no such thing that you can communicate without barriers only with pleasant people. As a rule, we all somehow find ourselves in situations where these difficulties arise. The task facing you at this moment is to feel the barrier, determine its type and apply the method that most effectively removes it. Be calm, self-confident, tolerant of the weaknesses of others and try not to get into conflict situations!